Thursday, August 31, 2006

Should I Run for President?

I guess the cat's out of the bag:
“The No.1 debate in the Allen campaign these days is whether George should announce that if re-elected to the Senate this year, he will forgo a run for President in ’08.” ...[T]he faction in the Allen camp wanting him to take this course “is led by [Washington attorney and longtime Allen confidant] Frank Atkinson and the faction that wants him to keep alive a bid for President is headed by [wife] Susan Allen.”
That's right, folks. Frank thinks I shouldn't run. But Susan and I just can't believe this "racist" label will actually stick. I've been saying the same sort of things for years--why am I so controversial now?

As many of you know, I find life in the Senate to be quite tiresome... I have always felt it was my destiny to someday lead the South and North as President of the United States... but now I don't know what to do. My fellow Virginians, I need your advice.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Run, Felix, run.

8/31/2006 9:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stick a fork in it, you're done.

8/31/2006 11:20 PM  
Anonymous Vabelle said...

You ask for our advice regarding your decision; a life-long friend tells you one thing, your mate another and you're -- understandably -- conflicted.

Please don't take what I say in a wrong way, but the decision may not be yours to make. You're not likely to lose the general (senatorial) elections in November -- I agree with you that negative polls ought to be ignored -- but... if by some freak accident you should lose...

You'll have 2 yrs twiddling your thumbs, in total invisibility -- do you think anyone in GOP will support you? Even the South is likely to abandon you; they're like piranhas at feeding time, when it comes to Presidential elections.

If you win in November, your chances *in the South* might be better; you made a very shrewd move with your "macaca incident" and the CCC (KKK once removed?) photo will help some too, I'm sure. I don't think anyone could smear you with the same elephant tail they used for McCain last time around.

But, what you win in the South, you'll lose at the West Coast. Even though California is your native state, you cannot expect it to support you; there, even the conservatives are so liberal it's enough to make one retch.

So it's damned if you do and damned if you don't. If I were you, I would withdraw from the political life, entirely, *now*.

Leave politics as a winner.

Buy more stock in Big Pharma and Bigger Oil (both in your and Susan's names. And fill out two separate tax reports, to maximize on tax cuts).

Retire to the South of France. Spain is cheaper, but the populace is less congenial (you know what I mean)and, besides, you already speak French, while you'd have to learn Spanish. Also, I hear that mademoiselles are less reluctant than senoritas; I think you'd enjoy that.

Subscribe to one of the major US newspapers and read about the mess you've left behind...

I can't imagine a more enticing future and, surely, it would be far less boring than your life in the Senate.

9/01/2006 12:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Believe me we in the Indian community, both Republicans & Democrats will not let the racist label die. We bombarded the media to make sure this was heard, and if you decide to run we will bring it back should it die. You will forever regret the day the word Macaca entered your underpowered little brain.

9/01/2006 3:04 AM  
Blogger sfmike said...

You couldn't be worse than the present occupant. Or could you?

Do Listen to vabelle: he/she is really quite brilliant. Leaving the country might be a good idea since you're probably going to end up in jail before this whole mess is over.

9/01/2006 2:56 PM  
Blogger Fightin' Felix said...

Vabelle, I cannot tell you where I'll be two years from now, but it sure as hell won't be France. I thank you for your advice, but someone has to carry the torch of freedom, liberty, and family values once President Bush can no longer protect us from the liberals and the terrorists who want to kill us in our beds as we sleep. My country needs me.

9/01/2006 5:55 PM  
Anonymous Vabelle said...

Dear Felix,

It's true that your country needs you. Unfortunately... it seems that you will also need your country to even get nominated, never mind elected as a President. And your country seems undisposed to support you, at least at the moment.

If not an exile, then, perhaps, an extended vacation (4-5 yrs)? If you quit while you're ahead, it'd be that much easier to stage a come back. Hopefully, by then, people will have forgotten your association with the current President.

I still recommend the South of France, for reasons stated before. I think you'd find it relaxing and entertaining. And the wine's good (can't vouch for beer, though)

Most sincerely, your supporter,
VA Belle (that's to give a clue to SFMike about my sex; women can think, even in Virginia, you know? And we don't need the West Coast libruls patronising us, you know?)

9/03/2006 12:10 AM  
Blogger sfmike said...

Dear vabelle: Thank you so much for clearing up the confusion about your gender. Without that space between the "a" and the "b" your online name sounded rather like a drag queen moniker (and drag queens can think, just like women, even in Virginia).

As for being called a West Coast librul, I feel suddenly unmasked, and have a sudden urge to flee to the South of France. Maybe I'll run into Fighting Felix there.

9/08/2006 3:10 PM  
Anonymous vabelle said...

Hi sfmike,

You're welcome. Though I don't know why you had to drag royalty into your posting; we, the people of VA got rid of them long time ago (and I thought it was a *king*, anyway).

Our Fighting Felix is stressing just that point when he mentions his closeness to Jefferson. Though I think it's kinda cute that he hasn't abandoned his Californian roots entirely and shows his closeness to his actor buddies (Heston, Reagan) also...

9/10/2006 8:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Virginia is becoming a swingstate with damn democrat swingers like Warner running for president. As a Battleground state Virginia and the republicans need to fight this moderate in sheeps clothing. Warner may not be endorsed yet, but his liberal positions are sure to win him praise in the primaries. Virginia needs to win back its Christian grassroots movement to rid ourselfs of the liberal rodents.

9/14/2006 12:50 AM  
Anonymous Vabelle said...

Yes, yes, last Anonymous! We need more people like you and me and Felix to represent us!

9/14/2006 6:24 PM  
Anonymous libra said...

longer Anonymous,

As usual, I agree with you (but still wish you'd pick some more distinct -- and less anonymous -- name); the more so after reading yr msg for the second time and after hearing some -- terrible -- new gossip today.

You thought *Warner* as a possible presidential candidate was bad??? They're trying to revive *Obama*!!!

Unless we really gird our loins and stand strong with or Senator and the -- *truly* -- Christian majority, we might end up living in a zoo...

9/16/2006 12:03 AM  

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