Thursday, August 17, 2006

Let the healing begin.

You say Macaque, I say Macaca,
You say Mullet-a, I say Mohawk-a,
Macaca, Macaque... Mullet-a, Mohawk-a,
Let's call the whole thing off.

My fellow Virginians, I know I've stepped in some deep macaca, if you will. But I don't want it to appear that I take this controversy lightly--I want it to appear that I'm deeply, deeply concerned.

I hope that you will accept one of several explanations we've provided for my previous statements, and choose to move on. That's why I'm starting this blog: To help us heal. I want you all to get to know the real me.

Who is the real me? First, let's be clear about who I'm not. I'm not one of "them": i.e., I'm not a friend to Hollywood movie moguls. I'm not an inside-the-beltway Virginian. I'm not a member of the elite. (Pretty much any "them" you can think of, I am not one of them.)

In fact, I'm just like you. I care about real Virginians and real Americans (and yes, that includes the blacks, hindus, and hispanos.) As November approaches, I want every Virginian to feel like we're together in this struggle to mold America into what we know it should be. My goals are your goals. My concerns are your concerns. That's why we must band together in mutual support and common action--a confederacy, if you will--so that come November, you can return a real Virginian back to the Senate.

Your son of the south,

George Felix Allen

ps. McCain told a monkey joke out on the trail! I noticed that some folks winced, but I thought it was funny. (Why? Because I'm moving on, that's why.)

2 Comments:

Anonymous Peter Coleman said...

The issue, Senator Allen, is that you thought it was appropriate to use a foreign-sounding name to identify someone who clearly wasn't a white supporter, in the attempt to belittle and categorize him. It was the "welcome to America" statement, expressed to an American-born citizen, that really rankled. Stop trying to get cheap laughs at the expense of others; earn your re-election honestly and aboveboard. You may have ideas to offer--do so, and stop calling people names!

8/18/2006 9:38 PM  
Anonymous Trisha Brock-Frazier said...

You want to sing? I have a song for you.

Where, oh where have your PR reps gone? Where, oh where can they be?

How could anyone think this was a good idea? If anything, it makes me dislike you even more.

8/22/2006 1:28 PM  

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